Learning to say ‘No’

It’s took me a while to learn how to say this word; I’m much more of a ‘yes’ person. I used to think if you don’t say yes to anything then you will never gain experiences or discover things you never thought you would be able to do. I do still believe this to be true, otherwise I wouldn’t have flew a plane, participated in writing competitions, or even tried an intern job that was solely irrelevant to my degree. I do find however that saying yes to new opportunities is a lot different than saying yes to people. Again I did used to do this a lot. If I had loads of work to do but someone wanted me to work or to go out with them, I would say yes.

It was only until last Sunday that I thought to myself,’no. Not this time.’ I was asked to help out which I am always happy to do, however when left on my own I discovered that others were expecting me to do more than was expected of me. Instead of helping a friend out, I was doing three jobs instead of one whilst trying to still help my friend out. It was then that I realised that my friend didn’t even expect me to do three jobs, it was others just pushing me because of my good nature. It is this particular point that I decided that no needs to be an option in my vocabulary. I understand that others may not be glad that I’m being more assertive but it’s because it is the truth. I don’t say no just to be awkward or a nuisance, it’s because I genuinely need a break. It’s as simple as that.

I understand that it will be hard for me to say no to people that I care about but if it means that it will result in a happier me, then so be it.

A Habit Unhinged

After my previous post I have been rattling my brain as to whether stress is within a personality or whether it can be broken like a habit. As I mentioned before, breaking this is a difficult task in itself. However since I last posted online, I finally think that I have began to unhinge my habit of stress.
At the beginning of last week I didn’t really think that it was much of a habit of mine,more of an anxious personality. However refusing to believe that this couldn’t be changed, I tried something in which I have always wanted to try. Yoga. To me yoga seemed similar to meditation, just with a few different shapes involved, however I understood the hype of this exercise instantly. Once I had finished what was only 25 minutes of exercise, I felt a little calmer, but more importantly relaxed. Since I only did this for less than half an hour, I was keen to try this again but for longer. As the week progressed I found that it was something I wanted to do on a regular basis, as it helped me keep things into perspective and therefore made me less stressed.
Thinking that things couldn’t get any better,I also went on my first spa day at the end of the week. At first I didn’t really think that a spa day was for me. I’m still unsure about getting an actual treatment as I didn’t get one on the day but after being so relaxed there it is something I would definitely consider. Luckily the spa I went to had loads of facilities that could suit anyone. For example I think that a sauna is too hot but they had a sanarium instead which is hotter than a steam room but cooler than a sauna. After relaxing this day, I was so relaxed that I was almost asleep the full weekend.
After deliberating whether my habit of getting stressed over pointless things can be overcome, I can certainly say that it can be. I now intend to continue my yoga daily whilst saving up for a spa day treat when I can. I wish you all the best in finding what will help you break your stress habit and I urge you to try one of the previous suggestions I have made in this post, as it truly helped me with my pressures and stress.